Yes, I am late but that just lets you know I brought in the new year so good I was too busy to blog *smile* I actually had a very good NYE.  Usually NYE is my favorite day ever.  But I wasn’t too enthusiastic about it this year.  Nevertheless, I hung with my family anyway and we had a ball.  My “play cousin’s ‘n nem” met up at a bar and celebrated together.  It was great til about 1am.  I was a little more then loose off the goose and had to go sleep in the car.  LMAO!! It was either that or sit in the club looking like a weirdo waiting to vomit.  I was a mess.  I totally drank way too fast and it just snuck up on me like BAM!  Drunk and puke-ish…I still had a good time.  So that’s all that really matters right!

New Years Day I took my baby to the movies.  We haven’t been in a while.  We went to see “Bolt in 3D“.  It was absolutely hilarious!  I loved every minute of it.  Oh, so did Kimoni.  LOL I probably enjoyed it more then him with some of the adult humor.

Friday I took a little mini vacation to see a couple friends in LA.  I actually went down for a job interview on Friday evening.  The company is located in ATL but their HQ is in LA.  So it was a 2-in-1 trip.  Went pretty good.  I’m not stoked about the job tho.  Not really into sales.  But it was worth a lil trip.  So Friday night me and my buddies just kicked it around, had some drinks, went for a drive then it was back home for me on Saturday since I had to come to work today.  By the way, it’s fuckin FREEZING.

*whew* So…that brings me to the conclusion of this blog which will shortly turn into a very serious and much needed rant.  As most of my readers currently know…I never tell my personal business online.  I’ve blogged once or twice about a crush or two but you will never know who I’m dating or sleeping with.  I’m not a nobody online.  Damn, that sounds so siditiy. But it’s the truth.  My name is always in something and I really try to keep my shit low key cause I’m just straight up not with the drama anymore.  I am too old for it and I have much more going on in my life.  There’s no place to entertain bullshit.  And this is my final time acknowledging it.

People on a particular website are the ones I’m really directing this to because I know where the BS starts and ends.  And it’s no where but there.  Among a group of losers.  Yes, I said it…LOSERS.  Here we are only on day 4 of a new year and already people are gossiping about me.  The gossip started on day 1.   I wasn’t even in LA before the rumors started as to why I was going in the first place.  Then I get there and get a text message advising me of yet another one.  Then I get back to the Bay and get a phone call telling me that the rumor has got to someone else close to me as well.  What happened to MIND YOUR BUSINESS?  I was in a “Wow” state the entire weekend at the abundance of conversations about what Upenzi is doing with her free time.  It’s a shame that no matter what I do people are speculating to try to figure out who I did it with, where and how we did it.  Am I not a grown woman?  Is this not MY life to live anyway I please? This isn’t the first time I have been on the receiving end of gossiping bored bitches with no lives.  But at almost 28, I find it ridiculous.  I find it repulsive even.  Not to mention, I don’t know how many times I have said that it’s pointless to talk about me because it ALWAYS comes back to me.  Every single time.

I have learned that I can’t change the opinions of others.  All I can do is do me.  And if you’re talking about me then I’m doing me pretty damn good cause I caught the eye of a nobody and you felt the need to discuss me in the first place.

Katt Williams says “Embrace your haters”.  So, c’mere hater…gimme a hug!  This is the last and final time I will acknowledge the fuckery.  I don’t know why I’m on your mind.  I don’t know why you keep talking about me.  Maybe I have something you desire.  You wish you had it like me…but you don’t so let it go! That concludes my PSA.

I hope everyone had a beautiful and fun New Year.  I hope this year is better then last year.  Stay strong, every goal is acheiveable.  It’s up to YOU to make it happen.

Ho Ho Ho!! Merry Christmas!! I can’t believe it’s actually Christmas.  This year has truly gone by really fast.  This was a difficult Holiday Season for most of the world.  Like everyone else, we are dealing with the recession woes.  Luckily my mom and I are still employed (knocking on some serious wood).  Money was really tight though.  We weren’t able to splurge on Christmas like we usually do.  But we had a good one nonetheless.  Here are a few photos.  Sorry they are kinda dark.  My cousin was here with her big expensive SLR and I was using that instead of my Kodak.  But I was on the wrong setting lol…so the pics came out darkish.  Guess I’m not ready for an SLR yet LOL.

More at Flickr.

Decided to try something new this weekend.  So how do you like it? Most people know that I usually wear half wigs or full wigs.  It’s not that I’m bald LOL I assure you I do have hair.  It’s just very hard to manage.  As I grew old my hair grew thicker.  The only style that my hair can handle is a wet look.  Which is adorable on me but only for the summer.  I use to get braids in the winter or sew in weaves but my hair started to break off the last 3 years.  I’m afraid to get braids again because my edges thin out.  And I don’t like full weaves cause I like the freedom to wash my hair every few days.  So…half wigs and full wigs have been my favorite for a while.  My friends tell me I should just chop off all my hair, which is now about 3 inches shorter then the wig I have on in these pics.  But something about covering your hair and chopping it all of…that just don’t seem right.  LOL! I use to be very versatile with my hair.  Which I’m assuming now is why it’s so badly damaged.  I’ve had every single hairstyle there is and just about every color.  Except platinum blonde.  That’s just extreme.

I’m not sure how long I’ll keep this style.  But I love the wig.  It’s human hair and very natural looking and the texture is easy to flat iron.  I’ll probably flip it the other way next week.  We shall see.  *smile* I tok hella pics today.  So check em out on Flickr.

There’s a YouTube Challenge called “Chubby Bunny”.   I’ve saw a couple people try it so I decided to go for it.  And yea…that’s my mama catching me and thinking I’m a damn fool. 

Do you ever have those moments where everything seems so perfect, almost too good to be true? But it feels so damn good.  Then something or someone comes along and takes a piss in your Cheerios?  I’m in that place right now and all I wanna do is live.  Live peacefully and drama free.  I’m not even experiencing drama from people around me this time.  It’s things in my own life.  Monika issues. I don’t even know who to blame because I still don’t think this is my fault.

Being the spoiled brat that I am, I know that I am always asking for more then what can be provided to me right now.  I want everything right now.  I don’t want to wait.  I guess because I see people who aren’t working half as hard as me get ahead and I feel like I deserve to move forward as well if not beyond the next person.  Is it really too much to ask to just live? I don’t want financial worries.  I don’t want to be a burden on anyone.  I just want to live and just be.  Why is that so hard?

I sat at my desk today and cried in silence.  Once again, my life is about to be twisted into something I am unprepared to deal with.  I really need a break.  It’s almost to the point where I am considering filing for bankruptcy.  It’s either that or continue to give God these unanswered prayers every day like I’ve been doing for what seems like forever.  I’m losing my faith.  Hmph, I can’t even type that without trembling.  I hear people say all the time “Give it to God, he’ll take care of it.” How many times do I need to give it to him?  Have I not given him enough?  Do I need to lay down in the street and bleed for him to see that I need HELP!

I’m trying really hard not to have pity on myself.  I know things will not always be this difficult.  I know this.  It just is what it is right now.  But the fact that it’s ALWAYS SOMETHING is what seems to be bringing me to yet another breaking point. I’m so sick of this.  I’m too selfish to be suicidal…a bitch just need a fuckin break!

And I know the song does not match 100%  but the message is still there…I just want to see my sunshine.

Do you have photos of you & celebrities? Good…post em on http://www.lovemyceleb.com see…easy peezy japoneezy!!